You are not logged in.
- Topics: Active | Unanswered
#1 Mar 25, 2009 7:52 AM
- Spyro man 123
- Member
- From: The land that never was.
- Registered: Feb 18, 2009
- Posts: 246
- Gems: 0
danger is everywhere, a Spyro and Cynder tragedy
Offline
#2 Mar 25, 2009 7:11 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: danger is everywhere, a Spyro and Cynder tragedy
Offline
#3 Mar 25, 2009 7:26 PM
- Spyro man 123
- Member
- From: The land that never was.
- Registered: Feb 18, 2009
- Posts: 246
- Gems: 0
Re: danger is everywhere, a Spyro and Cynder tragedy
Thank I write that when i was bored, but i know some on is going to say it sucks, its not the best but is alright.
Offline
#4 Mar 25, 2009 7:31 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: danger is everywhere, a Spyro and Cynder tragedy
I may admit that it isn't the best story ^^''
But so what? Mine stories isn't the best either...
This story made me cry a little and that was good...
I don't know whay but I like the sad stories and that's odd...
Offline
#5 Mar 25, 2009 11:43 PM
- Spyro.Lover.Forever
- Member
- From: Outside the realm of reality
- Registered: Mar 12, 2009
- Posts: 532
- Gems: 0
Re: danger is everywhere, a Spyro and Cynder tragedy
It's good. You better hope grevious doesn't see this
Offline
#6 Mar 26, 2009 6:59 AM
- Spyro man 123
- Member
- From: The land that never was.
- Registered: Feb 18, 2009
- Posts: 246
- Gems: 0
Re: danger is everywhere, a Spyro and Cynder tragedy
people keep saying that but why??
Offline
#7 Apr 25, 2009 8:44 PM
- ~cornys~
- Member
- From: Zanesville, Ohio (USA)
- Registered: Nov 16, 2008
- Posts: 761
- Gems: 0
Re: danger is everywhere, a Spyro and Cynder tragedy
It's great Flash Fiction... here's one of my typical Reviews... anything bad is minor By the Way... just trying to help...
(People get mad some times at me for this but here it goes.)
The Good
-High Emotion
-Tradgedy (rare among Fan Fictions that I read)
-Short (good if short on time)
-Writen in the morning (when you write in the morning you write clearer and without bias or emotion other than that of the writing there for you can better get into it)
The Bad
-Run on Senteces (mostly in the slow beginning)
-Short (lol I know it's both a plus and minus. (not time to build emotion in this case))
-Anti-climatic (Cynder dies rather quickly and randomly... common and very over lookable in this case doesn't much matter in the end)
-Grammer (besides run on sentences you also failed to Capitalize a few things... extremly normal... me too)
-Show more (Don't tell us exactly what happed tell us something that can figure out what happened... sort of hard to do... just something that you'll have to work on if you want to get serious about writing.. other wise don't much worry about it... but I'd still try a little... stop rambling me! )
Overall
I loved it. Started a little too slow for flash fiction and I thought that I might be reading a One Shot Short Story. quickly got into emotion though and shaped up very nicely... nice job!
If tomorrow may never come, and yesterday is just a memory, then what is today worth?
-Cameron (Cornys) Corns
Offline
#8 Aug 13, 2009 4:50 PM
- random
- Member
- Registered: May 16, 2009
- Posts: 82
- Gems: 0
Re: danger is everywhere, a Spyro and Cynder tragedy
ROAR HOW COULD YOU KILL-OFF CYNDER SHEHAS HAD A HARD ENOUGH LIFE AS IT IS. guh people make Cynder die but they never make that (censored) Ember suffer.
Offline
#9 Aug 13, 2009 8:07 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: danger is everywhere, a Spyro and Cynder tragedy
FANTARD!
Hey random try to relax... it is just a fanfic and don't dare to talk bad about anyone, even Ember even if she can be really annoying.
None of us wants to hear hatred by somebody like you
Besides the story is great! try next time to comment what you read and not what your feelings are becuase we all actually DON'T CARE!
Offline
#10 Aug 17, 2009 6:29 PM
- Kmn483
- Member
- From: A life, a body, a soul.
- Registered: Jul 06, 2009
- Posts: 130
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: danger is everywhere, a Spyro and Cynder tragedy
cool, i love sad endings! as long as it is by being broken up, and there is a choice to stay together, I hate that!
Never returning. may pop in once in a blue moon. *shrugs*
Offline
#11 Aug 20, 2009 7:09 AM
- cynderfan
- Member
- From: WHY ARE YOU READING MY LOCATIO
- Registered: Nov 21, 2007
- Posts: 1,863
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: danger is everywhere, a Spyro and Cynder tragedy
Offline