You are not logged in.
- Topics: Active | Unanswered
Pages: 1
#1 May 01, 2009 1:08 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
The Legend of Spyro: One's love
Here is a story I co-write with my friend beautygirl05
There also are on DA... check out her story http://beautygirl05.deviantart.com/
But here are a story we have co-write and we hope that you all will like it...
And please comment people we would love that
And thanks to my correcter Genobee8492 fom DA for correction of this story ^^
_____________________________________________________________
Chapter 1:
“I love you…” The three words rang through the purple dragon’s mind. ‘Does she love me? Did she really mean it? Do I love her?’ Spyro thought about the three words he heard. He opened his eyes to see the grass and trees again. He got up and looked at around for Cynder. She was nowhere around. He went off looking for her.
At the mean time somewhere else.
‘Did he here me? Do I mean it? Will he love me back?’ The black dragoness kept thinking of the words she had said. She opened her eyes to see a field. She got up and turned around. Cynder saw a forest, she looked through the field to find the dragon city, but couldn’t find any trace of Spyro. She went looking for him in the forest. ‘Is he dead? Where- Cynder got interrupted form her thoughts from bumping into something. She shook the stars away from her head to see Spyro. Her heart beat faster by the minute. ‘I hope he didn’t here me.’
“Hi, Cynder. Are you ok?” Spyro asked. ‘Should I tell her what I heard? Will she deny it?
“Oh yeah I’m ok!” Cynder replied back. “I saw the dragon city the dragon city. We should go there to tell the others we’re ok.”
“Ok” They flew away from the forest and towards the field. They got to the dragon city and landed. It had been repaired from all the damage from the war. They saw some moles in the distance. The moles saw them.
“Master Cynder! Master Spyro! You are ok and you killed Malefor! Hurray! We feared the worst!” The moles shouted as they ran towards them.
“Hey! And yeah, we did defeat Malefor! He won’t hurt us ever again!” Spyro replied back proudly. Cynder looked over to him. He was to busy chattering with the moles about their adventure. She looked around and saw Terrador in the distance.
“Terrador! We’re over here.” The figure stopped and turned around. He squinted his eyes and saw Spyro and Cynder.
“Spyro? Cynder?” Terrador said as he walked towards them. Spyro looked up from the moles and saw Terrador in front of him with Sparx close behind.
“Terrador! It’s a joy to see you again!” Spyro said excited.
“Hey! What about me!” Sparx said as he fluttered towards Spyro.
“Yes Sparx it’s a joy to see you again too.” Spyro said. Sparx flew up to Spyro’s head and sat on it.
“Where’s Ignitus?” Terrador said as he looked around. Spyro looked towards Cynder. Tears welled up in his eyes, Spyro and Cynder hung their heads.
“He sacrificed himself to get us through the fire.” Cynder replied sadly.
“I’m sorry to hear that, you guys should get some rest, you really need it” said Terrador.
“Yeah you’re right Terrador…” said Spyro and walked to his room.
“Um Spyro?” said Cynder while she blushed a little
“Yeah what is it Cynder?”
“Can… can I sleep with you tonight? I don’t want to be alone.” She said and blushed even more.
“Um… sure you can.” He answered `Maybe dos she love me´ he thought and they walked to his room.
My heart belongs to SexyCynder from DA ^///^
Picture by CASF (Cynder-And-Spyro-Fan)
Avatar by thedragonofdoom
Offline
#2 May 01, 2009 4:16 PM
- Aceedwin
- Member
- From: London, but not Soho.
- Registered: Dec 31, 2008
- Posts: 4,324
- Gems: 0
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
I find your piece somewhat dull, but on the other hand, introductions of fan fictions aren't usually works of art worthy of my serious approval.
English: It's not great, but it'll probably get better.
I wonder if I'll get told off for being slightly critical...
It is often said that before you die your life passes before your eyes. It is in fact true. It's called living.
Image from the legendary xkcd.
Offline
#3 May 01, 2009 6:38 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
This wasn't a comment I had hoped to get
And it will get better... I will post the next chapter tomorrow...
My heart belongs to SexyCynder from DA ^///^
Picture by CASF (Cynder-And-Spyro-Fan)
Avatar by thedragonofdoom
Offline
#4 May 02, 2009 7:24 AM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
Here is the next chapter...
it is a little shrot but it is still a good chapter I think
_____________________________________________________________
Chapter 2:
Spyro lay in his room, he was having a wonderful dream. He woke and sat up. Sparx was snoring loudly.
‘Wow, for a little thing he can snore loudly.’ Spyro thought to himself.
The three words popped into his mind again and kept repeating. I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you. Spyro was sweating a lot. His bed was wet from all the sweat.
He slowly walked out of the room. He went to the kitchen and grabbed some breakfast. He took his breakfast to the balcony and watched as the stars slowly disappeared and the sun came up.
He looked down and to his surprise Cynder was swimming in the pond. He looked at the beautiful black dragoness, she looked even more beautiful in the water.
`Do I really love her?´ he thought and daydreamed about her when he then realized that she was getting up from the pond and was walking back to where he was.
`W-What shall I say to her? How will she respond if I told her that I love her? Do I really love her?´ he thought and was getting nervous and he started to sweat again. Cynder then came in and saw Spyro, the same thought ran though her mind.
`Does he love me or more importantly, do I love him?´ she thought and looked at him and he looked at her. Spyro then broke the silence as he said nervously:
“H-Hi Cynder” she responded with a smile.
“Hi Spyro, what are you doing up here?” she asked. He then blushed a little.
“Um…I was…eating my breakfast.” He said which wasn’t even a lie.
“Mind if I eat with you?” she asked as she had taken her own breakfast with her and walked next to him. They didn’t talk they just ate there breakfast.
My heart belongs to SexyCynder from DA ^///^
Picture by CASF (Cynder-And-Spyro-Fan)
Avatar by thedragonofdoom
Offline
#5 May 03, 2009 6:54 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
Seriusly what is there wrong with this site...
No one comment my stories anymore so there is no need to post stories here...
It *bleep*s me off
PLEASE COMMET PEOPLE it will only take a short time to do that...
_____________________________________________________________
Chapter 3:
“Hey Cynder?” Spyro asked nervously ‘Should I tell her how I feel or just tell her I wanna go back to bed?’ Spyro thought.
“Yeah?”
“Uh…um….” ‘What should I do!!!!!!’ Spyro screamed in his head. “I uhh…gonna go to bed, I woke up early so I’m tired.” Spyro quickly said.
“Ok, I think I’m gonna go take another quick bath. See you later!” Cynder said as she walked to the pond. Spyro got up and flew to his balcony. He went to his bed and lay down. He couldn’t sleep. Too many thoughts of Cynder ran through. Spyro flew out the window and towards the hill. Cynder saw him fly away. “What is he doing?” Cynder thought out loud.
Spyro landed on top of the hill and pounded his fist into the ground. “UGGG!!!! WHY AM I HOLDING MYSELF BACK!!!!!!!!!!?” Spyro screamed. As soon as he said that Cynder came.
“Spyro? Are you ok? Why are you here?” Cynder asked nervously. ‘Should I tell him now? Does he feel the same?’ Cynder thought.
Spyro whirled around and looked at Cynder. “Huh? I’m ok! I uh…came here….Uh……because I couldn’t sleep.”
“Oh. I’m gonna go back to the pond.” ‘Ugh! Why did I hold back! Who cares if he doesn’t share the same feelings!? There will be other guys! But, on the other hand, I really love him!’ *sigh* Cynder flew away to the pond.
Spyro turned back and slammed his paw on the ground again. “Ugh! I did that again! I held myself back.” He flew back to the balcony of his room and saw that Sparx was up.
“Hey, man! You look upset. What’s wrong?” Sparx asked curiously.
“Nothing.” Spyro replied back.
“Come on Spyro! I know that look. What’s wrong?”
“Ok, you caught me. I have feelings for Cynder. I don’t know how to tell her, how she will react.” Sparx jaw dropped.
“You have feelings for Cynder?”
“Yeah,”
“Well if she doesn’t share the same feelings its ok! There will be other girls!”
“You’re right.” ‘I don’t care if there are other girls! I want her!’ Spyro sobbed in his mind. Spyro went back to the balcony and watched Cynder eating her breakfast. To his surprise Cynder was flying toward his balcony. He went into his room and went to the pile of pillows. He lay down and pretended to sleep.
“What the-Sparx was cut of by Spyro.
“Shhhh! Pretend I’m sleeping!” Spyro said and went back to “sleeping”.
“Ok”
Cynder flew in through the balcony and saw Spyro sleeping. Then she looked at Sparx. “Oh, hey Sparx how was your night?”
"Peaceful”
“Nice to know. I’m gonna go. Catch you later.” Cynder flew of the balcony and then went to hers. She went to the pillows and lay down. “I love you Spyro…” Cynder whispered and then went into a soft slumber.
My heart belongs to SexyCynder from DA ^///^
Picture by CASF (Cynder-And-Spyro-Fan)
Avatar by thedragonofdoom
Offline
#6 May 04, 2009 1:09 PM
- Aceedwin
- Member
- From: London, but not Soho.
- Registered: Dec 31, 2008
- Posts: 4,324
- Gems: 0
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
... An entire chapter based on awkwardness and emotional restraint? Introduce someone abstract, that'll shake things up. Remember, the key to a good story is the ability to react as your characters and grow their personalities as experiences stack up.
Romance is a useless focus. If romance is in a story, it should be no more than a major plot device. Any book that goes further will be terrible *cough*twilight*cough*.
May I also remind you that constructive criticism is better than blind complimenting anyway. I'm good at analysing books to see their strengths and weaknesses as works of art and not mere enjoyability (although it does come into it obviously). Fan fiction is always lacking like that. No don't even bother being hurt.
Don't bother being hurt, it won't help your skills as a writer.
It is often said that before you die your life passes before your eyes. It is in fact true. It's called living.
Image from the legendary xkcd.
Offline
#7 May 04, 2009 3:57 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
Listin I don't care about how good this story is...
My writing skills sucks and I know that so please be quiet if you don't have anything good to say...
I shall not use my writing skills for anything in my future...
I just write for fun and I don't like to hear comments like that so go and broter someone else please...
My heart belongs to SexyCynder from DA ^///^
Picture by CASF (Cynder-And-Spyro-Fan)
Avatar by thedragonofdoom
Offline
#8 May 04, 2009 6:07 PM
- Aceedwin
- Member
- From: London, but not Soho.
- Registered: Dec 31, 2008
- Posts: 4,324
- Gems: 0
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
... Right... It's just the fact that you were complaining about not having any comments, it led me to the conclusion that either you are looking for comments to see how you're doing and how you could do better, or you are incredibly vain and just want compliments. Hmmm... You're not getting the whole idea of comments I feel.
It is often said that before you die your life passes before your eyes. It is in fact true. It's called living.
Image from the legendary xkcd.
Offline
#9 May 04, 2009 6:11 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
Hmm okay... and this have made me to think what I thought from the start...
This website sucks so much with that I don't get good comments so I will stop post anything of my two fanfics here...
Thanks for reminding me how much this site sucks...
My heart belongs to SexyCynder from DA ^///^
Picture by CASF (Cynder-And-Spyro-Fan)
Avatar by thedragonofdoom
Offline
#10 May 04, 2009 6:17 PM
- Aceedwin
- Member
- From: London, but not Soho.
- Registered: Dec 31, 2008
- Posts: 4,324
- Gems: 0
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
Hmmm... Am I supposed to be upset? Let's face it, if you're idiotic enough to believe that you are perfect and only deserve praise, I doubt anybody wants you about.
If you won't accept that you will only get good comments when you accept ideas and critisicm, you won't get any good comments. I'm suprised you refuse to believe this actually. I mean, blaming it on the site... Please... I think I'm the only one here who puts learning above feelings.
If you just want to write for fun, don't whine about not getting comments.
It is often said that before you die your life passes before your eyes. It is in fact true. It's called living.
Image from the legendary xkcd.
Offline
#11 May 04, 2009 6:22 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
Frist: no you should not be upset about this...
It is only my problem...
And yeah I know that some people want to emprove themselfs but I will not becuase I can't use it to anything...
I can't write different then I already do so it wouldn't help to hear comments like that...
And comments like that make me in a really bad mood and it ruins the rest of my day.
My heart belongs to SexyCynder from DA ^///^
Picture by CASF (Cynder-And-Spyro-Fan)
Avatar by thedragonofdoom
Offline
#12 May 14, 2009 7:11 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
Ups I had forgot to post the story here ^^"
_____________________________________________________________
Chapter 4:
The next morning Cynder woke up and thought about what she said yesterday before she went to sleep.
`Yeah I do really love him…but does he love me the same way…the way he acted yesterday was kind of odd.´ thought Cynder and went to get some breakfast.
Spyro was just getting off his bed, he thought about yesterday and how he had acted.
“I just hope she didn’t hear me yesterday.” He said with a sigh.
“Why?” asked Sparx and was confused.
“I said out loud that I had feelings for her…and she was right there.”
“Ouch dude…hey if you really like that doom-girl-“
“DON’T CALL HER THAT!!!” Spyro yelled in anger.
“Hey relax dude…clam down we don’t want your dark side to come out.” Sparx said and flew a little away from Spyro.
“I-I’m sorry Sparx I didn’t mean too…”
“I understand buddy…what I was about to say was…what about you ask her out on a date then?”
Spyro’s eyes widened as he heard the word ‘date’.
“I-I-I’m not sure-“
“Come on buddy you can do it if you really love her that much `even though she wants to kill us, I just know it´”
“Umm…I will think about…thanks a lot Sparx.” Said Spyro and smiled to his brother.
“I know I’m smart.”
Spyro shook his head of his brother’s comment. “I’m gonna go grab myself some breakfast, do you want anything?”
“Sure! I’ll have a strawberry and a piece of meat.”
“Ok, strawberry and meat. Got it,” Spyro got up and walked out of the room. To his surprise he saw Cynder in the hall way and making her way to the garden with her food. ‘Should I tell her now!? Will she share the same feelings! What do I do?’ Spyro thought. He walked to the kitchen and grabbed some food for himself and Sparx. He quickly went to his room with his food not trying to get seen by Cynder. He got to his room and gave the food to Sparx.
“That was fast” Sparx said with a mouth full of strawberries.
“Yeah, I guess.” Spyro replied as he chewed on some meat.
“Wait, let me guess. You saw Cynder and didn’t want to tell her your feelings!”
“No,”
“Spyro,”
“Ok Fine I did.”
“Buddy, you’re gonna have to tell sooner or later!”
“You’re right. I think I’m gonna go to bed again.”
“Ok, I’m gonna go and catch some fresh wind.” Sparx flew out the balcony. Spyro laid down.
“I love you Cynder…” Spyro whispered.
My heart belongs to SexyCynder from DA ^///^
Picture by CASF (Cynder-And-Spyro-Fan)
Avatar by thedragonofdoom
Offline
#13 May 14, 2009 7:12 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
Chapter 5:
The black dragoness walked into Spyro’s room.
“Spyro?” She asked as she put a paw on his shoulder.
“huh? Sparx…I’m not gonna ask Cynder on a date now. I’m gonna do it later.” Spyro said as he moved Cynder’s paw away.
“Sparx, How did your hand get so big?” He opened his eyes and his eyes nearly popped out of him. Cynder was standing right in front of him. He wanted to melt away.
“Spyro! Is it true that you love me!? Oh I should have told you my feelings sooner! I love you too Spyro!” Cynder said.
Spyro was shocked. “Y-You really do?”
“Yeah I do Spyro `Come on Spyro please say that you love me the same way please´” said Cynder and looked deep into Spyro’s purple eyes.
“Um…C-Cynder…” “Yeah Spyro?”
“W-W-Will y-you go-on a-a d-d-d-d-d-d-date w-with m-me?” he stuttered and blushed, his heart beated like never before as he asked her.
“`Not what I hoped to hear but it is a start…he’s maybe too nervous?´ Sure Spyro I would love that” she answered with a smile.
It was like something heavy fell from Spyro’s heart. “Y-You will?” he said with a happy tone and he looked at Cynder’s emerald-green eyes.
“Of cause Spyro…so where shall we go?” asked Cynder who was unsure where to go.
Spyro thought about it. “What about the park?” he asked.
“Sure let us go.” “O-Okay.” he said and was still nervous.
After that they were gone then Sparx woke up.
“Hey Spyro where are you…nah never mind…oh let’s eat some butterflies.” He said and flied off to find some butterflies.
In the mean time Spyro and Cynder had come to the park and walked around...but quietly.
`Come on Spyro talk to me…you don’t have to be this nervous´ thought Cynder as they walked.
`Why am I still so nervous? This doesn’t look like me…I can beat the dark master but not my love to a dragoness´ Thought Spyro.
“I-I’m sorry that I am this nervous Cynder.” He apologized. “It is alright Spyro…you don’t have to be nervous.” Spyro then nodded and they continued to walk.
But there was a dragon that followed them, it was a grey dragon, he had white marks all over his body and he had a tail blade formed as an axe. He walked some meters away them and looked at them. `*bleep* that black dragoness is beautiful´ he thought.
Spyro looked around at some times. “Is there something wrong Spyro?” asked Cynder worried about the way he acted.
“I think that someone is following us.” He answered and still looked around.
“Um…can’t you just ignore it…we are on a date after all…our first date.” Said Cynder that was about to get bored.
“I’m sorry Cynder…what about some ice-cream?” he asked.
“Yay I love ice-cream.” Said Cynder and ran playfully away from him.
“Hey wait up!” shorted Spyro and ran after her.
`Hmm…this will maybe be more difficult than I thought´ thought the grey dragon and still followed them.
My heart belongs to SexyCynder from DA ^///^
Picture by CASF (Cynder-And-Spyro-Fan)
Avatar by thedragonofdoom
Offline
#14 May 14, 2009 7:14 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
Here is the last one I have ready ^^"
_____________________________________________________________
Chapter 6:
Spyro and Cynder were licking there ice cream and looking into each other’s eyes. “Completely sick! That beautiful dragoness shouldn’t be going out with that creep! She should be with me!” The mysterious grey dragon that was following Cynder said under his breath.
“Hey, Cynder?” Spyro asked.
“Yeah?” Cynder replied back as she licked the ice cream off her lips.
“Did you he-“ Spyro was cut off when a grey dragon pounced on Spyro.
“SPYRO!!!!!” Cynder screamed in horror as she tried to pull the weird dragon off of Spyro. “Get your hands off my date!!!!!!!” The grey dragon got off and glared at the black dragoness.
“What’s the problem!? I was saving you!” The grey dragon replied back.
“What the f***?” How the hell were you saving me! I was on a date!” Cynder replied back in pure disgust.
“I was…err…um….ugh! Sorry for my poor behavior. I’m Kiba.”
“It’s alright. Why were you following us!?”
“Because…because…I like you!” Kiba pounced on Cynder. Spyro’s eyes nearly popped out of him. The shock turned into pure anger.
“Hey you she said that she was with me.” said Spyro in anger and pushed Kiba off her.
“So purple boy you want to fight?” he said and repaired to a fight.
“Hey stop it your two!” shouted Cynder angrily.
“Hum…alright” Kiba said.
“Come Cynder let us get away from that jerk.” Said Spyro and took his wing around Cynder and they walked away together.
`Just wait purple boy she will be mine someday´ thought Kiba and walked away.
“Are you alright Cynder?” asked Spyro as they was getting father away from the grey dragon.
“Yeah thanks Spyro for saving me.” She said and looked deeply into his eyes and moved slowly her head forward to his. But Spyro noticed what she was doing and turned his head away.
`Oh he is maybe not ready yet for that´ thought Cynder disappointed and they continued their date.
______________________________
Kiba belongs to ME!
My heart belongs to SexyCynder from DA ^///^
Picture by CASF (Cynder-And-Spyro-Fan)
Avatar by thedragonofdoom
Offline
#15 May 14, 2009 10:10 PM
- Spyro&Cynder4ever
- Member
- From: the place inbetween a dream an
- Registered: May 10, 2009
- Posts: 132
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
So far really good! this is interesting!
Spyro&Cynder4ever
"Why won't you fight back?!"
"You left me with nothing to fight for"
Offline
#16 May 18, 2009 7:00 PM
- DragonOfDrakness1992
- Member
- From: Danmark
- Registered: Nov 19, 2008
- Posts: 309
- Gems: 0
- Website
Re: The Legend of Spyro: One's love
Thanks
_____________________________________________________________
Chapter 7:
Spyro and Cynder were still walking in the park for their first date.
“Oh Spyro I have to…” she said and looked at a nearby bathroom.
“Oh yeah of course…I will wait over there.” He said and she then ran to the bathroom and Spyro walked over to a bench and relaxed and slowly fell asleep.
Spyro woke up to see the horizon. He sat up and looked at the bathroom. “I guess Cynder is still there.” Spyro thought aloud to himself as he turned his head away. He lay back down and tried to drift into another sleep.
“Spyro!” Spyro jerked his head up to see Cynder walking with a black dragoness. “I wanted you to meet my new friend, Aura.” Cynder said as she pointed to the black dragoness. Spyro looked towards her. Her chest scales were violet and her horns were a very light purple color. The end of her tail was a hook shape thing.
“Hi…I’m Spyro, nice to meet you Aura.” Spyro said to Aura. ‘Wow…He’s very handsome. I really want to go out with him. But, I can’t…Cynder loves him.’ Aura thought to herself.
“Hi…” Aura said dreamily.
“She needs to stay at the dragon city with us.” Cynder said
“Oh okay, she could come with us and stay at the temple.” said Spyro and smiled.
“Really? Can I? `Then I could be closer to him´” said and thought Aura.
“Sure that could be great…shall we walk home?” Asked Cynder and the four dragons walked away.
Cynder gave Spyro a kiss on the cheek and whispered in his ear.
“Thanks for the date.” They both blushed and smiled at each other.
`*bleep* this is going to be difficult´ thought both Aura and Kiba who were following them and continued to walk to the temple.
My heart belongs to SexyCynder from DA ^///^
Picture by CASF (Cynder-And-Spyro-Fan)
Avatar by thedragonofdoom
Offline
Pages: 1